Sunday, October 31, 2010
Saturday, October 30, 2010
-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
-There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what was going on when I first saw it.
-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
-How are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
- Was learning cursive really necessary?
- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".
- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.
- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent "that guy" from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"
-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
- Bad decisions make good stories
-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.
-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....
-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.
-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room.
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Shoot!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.
-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I’d bet everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time...
-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How do I respond to that?
-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.
-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel fat before dinner.
-The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
Friday, October 29, 2010
The things we do for love.......well its not quite love....but he is awfully cute! :) I got a text tonight inviting me to go to a costume party. Let me just start by saying I love getting dressed up in crazy outfits. I love picking up dumb junk we have laying around (hats, scarves, glasses, gloves, etc) and putting them on. However, I only do that junk in the comfort of my own home. Halloween or no Halloween I do NOT get all costumed up so I can go out. I've NEVER been to a costume party and I've never had the desire to go to one. Yet as I type this I'm getting ready to walk out the door to go to my very first costume party, all decked out in 80s work out gear,...all because of one little text. *sigh* It really is a bit ridiculous! :)
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Friday, October 15, 2010
1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F. Begin by browning the butter. Place the butter in a small saucepan and cook over medium heat. It will foam at first, but just keep stirring occasionally. When it is a golden amber color, remove from heat, strain, and set aside to cool a bit (see photos above for help).
2. In a medium bowl, combine your flour, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt, and allspice. Set aside. In your large mixing bowl, combine the pumpkin puree, brown sugar, and granulated sugar. Beat until combined, then add in the butter, mixing until combined. Add in the eggs, one at a time, and mix until combined. Gradually add in the flour mixture, finishing by hand if needed so as to not overmix.
3. Spread the batter into a greased and/or lined 9×13 cake pan. Bake for 25-30 minutes, until set and just slightly golden brown. Allow to cool completely before removing (I placed my cakes in the fridge to speed this up).
4. While the cakes cool, make the frosting. Beat together the butter and cream cheese until combined (at least 3 minutes), then add in the 1 1/2 cups of powdered sugar, the 2 teaspoons milk or cream, the cinnamon, and the vanilla extract. Beat until light and fluffy, as least another 3 minutes, then scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add in another cup of powdered sugar, beat until fluffy, then another, and beat again until fluffy. The frosting should be firm but not stiff. Add another cup of powdered sugar if you feel that the frosting is not firm enough (it should hold peaks for a moment or two).
5. When the cake has cooled, place it in a large bowl with half of your frosting and mix until combined. If the cake is not holding together in ball shapes, add half of the remaining frosting, mix, and check the consistency again. If you want, add the rest of the frosting, but you probably won’t need to. On a lined baking sheet, roll the cake into balls about the size of a tablespoon, then place on the sheet. Continue until you have used up all of the cake, then place in the fridge or freezer to firm up for 20-30 minutes.
6. To make the truffles, now you will have to melt your chocolate. Use a double boiler to do this; if you don’t have one, you can make your own (see the photos above for visual instruction). To make your own, fill up a pot with about an inch of water, then place a glass bowl over it, making sure there’s a bit of room between the water and the glass bowl on top. Heat over medium heat. Make sure that your top bowl is stable; if any water touches the chocolate, it will be completely, 100% ruined (seriously). Add the chocolate into the glass bowl, making sure there is absolutely no way that any water will ever come in contact with it, and stir gently until melted.
7. When the chocolate has melted, add in a few drops of your gel food coloring, and stir until you have the color you want. Take one cake ball at a time and roll it in the chocolate with a fork, until covered, then remove and place back on the baking sheet. Repeat until you have done all of your cake balls. Place in the fridge or freezer to firm up for 15-20 minutes.
8. Now melt your milk chocolate (or dark chocolate) to drizzle over the truffles. Melt in a microwave-safe bowl in 20-30 second intervals, stirring in between, until melted. Spoon the melted milk chocolate into a plastic bag, then cut off a tiny bit of the tip. Drizzle over the truffles. Place back in the fridge or freezer until ready to serve. Makes 30-40 truffles, depending on their size.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
I get to play mom to a set of 2 year old triplets today and tomorrow. Their parents went on a little get away before the dad deploys so I got the kiddos! :) Needless to say it has been a busy day. The kids are great. I adore them. I'm just praying they sleep through the night (which they rarely do). The one boy is a diabetic so we have to check his blood sugar levels and give him insulin every time he eats. The other boy has to be in physical therapy for muscle issues. And the girl....well she is all drama all the time! :) Their mother is a saint!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Friday, October 8, 2010
Thursday, October 7, 2010
-1/3 cup fresh lime juice
-1/2 cup olive oil
-1 clove garlic, minced
-1 teaspoon salt
-1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
-2 (15 oz) cans black beans, drained & rinsed
-1 1/2 cup frozen corn kernels
-1 avacado- peeled, pitted & diced
-1 red bell pepper, chopped
-2 tomatoes, chopped
-6 green onions, thinly sliced
-1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro (optional)
Place lime juice, olive oil, garlic, salt, & cayenne pepper in a small jar. Cover with lid, and shake until ingredients are well mixed. In a salad bowl, combine beans, corn, avocado, bell pepper, tomatoes, green onions, and cilantro. Shake lime dressing, and pour it over the salad. Stire salad to coat vegetables and beans with dressing, and serve.